Sex as a Gift
That’s what it’s all about.
Too many men treat women as a sperm receptacle, a warm ejaculatory tool, and then walk away. Sometimes run away. Afraid of commitment or of losing themselves or a number of other unfortunate reasons. The women are left feeling used and tossed aside, and it’s not fun.
Show some respect.
Sex is a gift.
And it’s not always (although it is usually and therefore stereotypically) men who devalue sex. Sometimes women do, too. They use it for a tool or a ploy or a manipulation tactic.
Sex is a gift two people give to themselves and each other. It can be beautiful and hot and wet and ecstatic, and it can be horrible, too. Whatever it can be, it’s almost always intense. There is no other way two people can explore and experience each other, physically as well as emotionally.
These great lines are taken from the Torchwood episode “Out of Time:”
“There’s nothing casual about what we just did. Sex shouldn’t be devalued. Both parties should give it 100% concentration. Because when you take off together, its the next best thing to flying.”
Sex shouldn’t be devalued. Ever.
What many men don’t seem to understand is that sex for most women means something. They are quite literally opening up themselves and taking another person into their body. It’s highly intimate and profound.
Every sexual act does not need to lead to commitment or marriage, so don’t hyperbolize my meaning here. Friends can have great sex, the coveted “friends with benefits” arrangement or “fuck buddies,” but don’t assume it means nothing. It doesn’t have to mean the rest of your lives, but acknowledge that your friendship is likely on a deeper level than your friends with whom you don’t have sex. Just ensure you are both on the same page, or it could be disasterous for your friendship.
Certainly there is nothing wrong with NSA sex or just hooking up. Nothing at all. It can be very liberating and fun for both parties, just don’t assume she understands that. The default feelings for women are much deeper when it comes to sex. For most women, they need to feel a certain connection with a man before allowing them in.
It is a great gift for a woman to let you enter her body. Treat it as such.
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~ by omgrey on April 13, 2011.