As House says…
This has been a very hard lesson to learn, as I don’t lie, really. I tweeted the words “Everybody Lies” one day when I was feeling quite discouraged with people, and I got a wonderful reply. This person said, “That’s not accurate.” Perhaps “Everybody Has Lied” is more accurate, but that once someone grows up and takes responsibility, one realizes there is a better way than to lie, especially in intimate relationships, either platonic or romantic. For, as I’ve said so many times before, lying & deception is the ultimate betrayal.
These untruths, uttered out of fear or laziness, destroy relationships. And for the purposes of this post, lying includes deception, keeping information away from your partner or Significant Other when you know it’s something that should be assessed.
It just makes everything worse. Whatever the action or thought, however bad it might be, it’s made infinitely worse by lying or deception. Your adding deception on top of whatever pain the thought or action might cause.
I learned this entire lesson again this summer. I don’t do deception. I don’t lie. As you can see in my blog, I am very open and very honest. Recently, I allowed myself to be a part of a deception, although it wasn’t my deception, I was complicit in it. And that’s bad enough.
If you find yourself lying to those you love, deceiving them, grow up. You don’t have to stop playing video games or reading comic books. You can still play in the rain. You can still act spontaneously and enjoy life in a childlike wonder, but stop the deception. It hurts you and everyone around you. Take responsibility for your actions. And stop lying.
Respect yourself and respect your relationships enough to tell the truth. Things are infinitely less complicated when the truth can be shared.
However, reality teaches us again and again that most people do lie, and do so often. So regard others with a healthy dose of skepticism around their integrity until they prove themselves trustworthy by their actions, not just their words.
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~ by omgrey on September 21, 2011.
Posted in Romance & Relationships
Tags: author, broken heart, grief, healing, heartbroken, honesty, infidelity, love, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationship advice, relationships, romance, sex, steampunk