The Survivor Thread
Shakesville: The Survivor Thread [trigger warning]
So very sobering to see how prevalent sexual assault it, and how often it is normalized.
I know I’ve normalized it for the past 35 years. Not anymore.
Reading what other women have endured helps me see just how horrible it really is. It has happened over and over my entire life, and I didn’t even consider it assault until recently.
- from men driving up in a parking lot asking for directions while masturbating
- to men masturbating next to me in movie theaters
- to groping me as I walk by or during a hug or in the dark
- to a professor making me touch him and cornering me and pinning me down
- to a doctor rubbing his erection against my arm during an examination
- to strangers exposing themselves to me
- to men not taking no for an answer (over and over and over and over again)
- to giving into sex during my twenties because I was afraid of being raped if I didn’t (turns out, that’s rape)
All those things are sexual assault, turns out.
All this time I’ve had a tendency to minimize it and blame myself for not doing something more in the moment or screaming or running away or calling them out or something…
But it’s not my fault.
100% of the fault and responsibility lies on the perpetrators, the sick fucks who do this to other people.
It’s a cultural issue.
Since Shakespeare’s Sister closed the comment on that post, please share your story below, if you’d like. Talk about the number of times you’ve been sexually assaulted, even if you didn’t know it was assault at the time. Feel free to remain anonymous.
This is a safe place. All comments are monitored.
- Dancing in the Darkness
- After Silence
- A Rape Survivor’s Blog
- Understanding the Survivor of Rape
- Compensating the Rape Survivor (RAINN)
- Pandora’s Project
- Partner Rape (RAINN)
- For Women Raped by Husbands or Boyfriends (Pandora’s Project)
- Aphrodite Wounded
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~ by omgrey on September 12, 2012.
Posted in Trauma & Recovery
Tags: austin burner community, austin ecstatic dance, austin poly community, austin poly rapist, austin polyamory, author, bdsm, broken heart, bureau of erotic discourse, burning flipside, fear, flipizen, grief, healing, heartbroken, honesty, love, love poetry, men can stop rape, misogyny, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, poem, poetry, polyamory, rape, rape survivor, relationship advice, relationships, romance, sex, sexual assault, sexual assault survivor, shattered, trauma bond